ANTIBACTERIAL COFFEE~

I found my cup of coffee right where I left it as I rushed off to be late for work this morning.  A quick survey of the half empty, half full cup resulted in a green light and I downed the now room temperature hazelnut tainted beverage with almost, but not quite, the same enthusiasm I did this morning when it was still piping hot. Possible bacterial contamination never even crossed my mind. In two swallows it was gone, leaving just a slick mocha colored residue on the inside of my coffee mug.. and an ant carcass.

Ant carcass? 

Well, there, see... just as I suspected.  Day old coffee that's been sitting out in the elements is safe to drink because it will kill anything that tries to settle in it, including bacteria and ants!

To Observe or To Not To.

Seems like now days every day is a holiday.  Every occasion warrants a gift.  I understand Valentines but Saint Patrick's Day?  Cards and gift bags are available at all fine retailers and discount $ Stores for all your gift giving convenience. 

Anniversaries for every occasion imaginable...

What about the anniversary of the decision to divorce?  And while we're on the subject, is there a shorter term for the event because having to say 'the decision to divorce' is quite a mouthful that can surely be shortened to some idiotic, insensitive acronym of some sort.

This time last year Dickidoo was probably squirming and losing sleep over how to break the news of his life changing decision.  This time last year I was ignorantly happy in my 'good-enough' rut of a life.  It wasn't my idea of  'Happily Ever After' but it would do, or so I thought.  He thought differently.

This time this year, which is right now, Dickidoo and I remain polite friends, no benefits, no illusions and no real direction.  We're just floating with the tide, in a slow back and forth motion that gets us nowhere.  There is no fighting, no bickering, no need for secrets.  I have my dignity which is all I thought I wanted, but this is barely an existence.  I wonder if maybe we have taken two steps back.

In an effort to keep it real and focused I feel the need to mark our morbid little anniversary.  July 8th, the day my heart truly broke in half.  I wonder if he remembers the date?  Probably not.  It was probably just a blur to him.  But to me it was, for a moment in time, the moment that redefined my life.

I'm not sure if this calls for a celebratory card or a sympathetic one.  Only time will tell.  But I think there will be chocolate and alcohol involved.