yeah...

I stopped a school teacher yesterday. She told me that she was a teacher like that would make it okay. It didn't. If anything it made her look worse in my eyes. When I got home I made sure she wasn't a teacher at Oompa High. To my relief she wasn't. That would have seriously ticked me off.

I walked past Henry The Homicidal Goldfish after work, chomping on a huge tuna fish and alfalfa sprout sandwich. I suddenly felt guilty and hid the sandwich behind my back as I tried to avoid Henry's accusing glare. Then I looked closer at him... one of his fillets would fit quite nicely between two slices of bread.

The Shit Hound farts worse than any person in the house. I swear she smiles every time she farts, kind of like a kid smiles when he smells cookies baking in the oven. It's like she knows that she's got a tasty little snack in the making.

Art called me from his Pink Haired Girlfriend's car this afternoon. They were on their way up town when they saw a big red pick-up truck with white feathers on the windows and sides. BIG RED LIVES! An old man is driving her now. I hope they travel many safe and happy miles together.

I'm tired. It's after 1 am. I stink. I smell like tuna fish and alfalfa. Think Dickidoo wants to cuddle?