Thursday, December 2, 2004

DUST BUNNY HIGHLIGHTS July 2004

* I am Okinawan.... I am only Indian by injection.

* 'Boobidoo', which is when your stomach sticks out farther than your boobies do!

* The life span of a dust bunny depends on the enviroment.  For instance, a common dust bunny that inhabits my house thrives and tends to have a longer life span than one that would dwell in my sister's house.

"My butt hurts, kiss it better?" 

'Hi Mom, whats for supper?'  I almost reply 'fingernails, boogers and spit', but the neighbors are out and I don't want them to think that I feed my kids the same thing EVERY night. 

This morning I was in the girls bathroom and found myself having to duckwalk around the bathroom looking for scraps on the discarded cardboardtoilet paper tubes just so I could wipe!   

One year I got a note from my son's teacher stating that I hadn't sent in the tissue.  I wrote back to her... Oh thats okay, he doesn't use tissue, he uses his teeshirt.  She did not ask for the tissue again.  Now if they asked for toilet paper, well, that I could understand.

If the hair on your legs is starting to poke through your jeans and dustbunnies stick to you like velcro then it is time to shave your legs.

All of their fancy, modern toys were strewn all over the house and they were running up and down the stairs, chasing each other with the long empty wrapping paper tubes, swinging them like swords, shooting pingpong balls from them, or trumpeting out a melody.  And I was right there with them, waving my wrapping paper tube over my head like a warrior princess with a bent sword, with my calico ribbon crown sitting lopsided on my head. 

I went grocery shopping after work last night.  I was in a bad mood to begin with, thanks to my head ache.  Having to fork out $90 didn't help matters.  And for what, biodegradable products that we will consume only to 'exhume' at the end of our digestive cycle and flush down the toilet?  Is that what I work for... the production of solid waste? 

Note:  Click on the asteriks to link to the original entries.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG!!  Love the Boobido comment...haven't heard that one before.  
And then...I couldn't stop laughing about the teacher reminding you of your neglected tissue and your son's t-shirt.  Thanks for the laughs this morning.
Michele

Anonymous said...

I absolutely can relate to many entries into your first one listed, I followed the * back on that one! lol The shortest time I ever had a Christmas Tree up was Christmas Eve day and taken down Christmas day (afternoon) it had no lights and only one ornament......sad I know! lol But I have a hard time being Merry this time of year.

Anonymous said...

Those are so funny!  

Anonymous said...

I'm laughing so hard.  Thanks I really needed a good laugh today.  
~Promise

Anonymous said...

AHAHAHAHAHA!! BOOBIDOO, WOOHOOO!! TOOO FUNNY!
MY DAILY DOSE OF DORN!
KIM.

Anonymous said...

YOU'RE TOOOOOOOOO FUNNY!!!

I remember some of these... I still laughed!

angie

Anonymous said...

I love these kind of entries! I have not had time to read journals like normal and this just made my day. I got to read all the best parts but in a lot shorter time! Thanks Dorn.
Missy

Anonymous said...

You crack me up!!!!

Anonymous said...

i laughed all the way through as usual. i hope things are going good for you and your family. have a good one!!   rachel  

Anonymous said...

OHHHHH TOOOO FUNNY!!!  I kinda solved the tissue/TP prob...I encourage all to blow their noses & go to the bathroom at the same time, of course, using the same TP, er, as long as they don't get the order mixed up <g>, yeah I'm gross mommy of the year, hehehe....~Mary Anne~

Anonymous said...

These were great, I remembered several from the original entries...... :-) Thanks for the recap and the laughs
!

JerseyGirl

Anonymous said...

Um.... I think I need to shave my legs........ my pants size has gone from a 6 to a 22! (Jk)

LoL!!! I can so relate to the fancy toy thing. When I was little I didn't have much if any real toys, they were cardboard tubes, boxes, ice cube makers (needed them for bath tube boats), paper air planes, bottle caps (shoot people with them), and anything else but the toy that I could get my hands on then and there became a toy!

Blessings. :)

http://journals.aol.com/glopsblink/ATreasureTroveofGoodies

Anonymous said...

Good Lord you missed your calling, get out from behind that register and get up on stage...you are so funny.  My cheeks hurt from laughing.....Sandi