DISPUNDIT

I voted yesterday.  Did you?  I had to stand in line to sign in and get my ballot... there was one person in front of me.  It was a tall gentleman, whom I will call #134.  He asked a lot of questions.  He didn't know his precinct.  He had to be told step by step how to fill out his name and address card.  He even tried to walk away with the registrar's pen. 

When the indignant registrar retrieved his pen, it was my turn.  The first thing I had to do was produce identification.  I have voted in 3 different states over the years and have always had to show proof of identification so I'm still baffled as to why suddenly this has become an issue of discrimination.  Nobody else in the polling area seemed to mind the requirement.  I think certain nega-ticians are just looking for an excuse to have a re-count should the need arise.

As the registrar searched the list for my name, I admitted to him that I wasn't sure which precinct I was in.  He gave me a weary smile.    His assistant gave a laugh that didn't really reach her eyes and informed me that I wasn't the only one today to say that.    The registrar came to Dickidoo's name and looked at my driver's license then up at me to verify that I wasn't Steven.  'Thats my husband,' I informed him, 'I'm probably on the next page'.  I wasn't offended,  I was just happy I was in the right precinct. I was voter #135.  (The number 135 probably stood for the amount of people who had no idea what precinct they were in.)

I took my mile long ballot and went to the end of the line of voters waiting their turn in the row of voting booths lined up at the foot of the Elementary School cafeteria / auditorium stage.  I glanced confidently at the ballot for I knew exactly who I was going to vote for.  Then I saw the other candidates.... judges... These guys I hadn't known about.  I don't know anything about judges!  I haven't had to deal with a judge since Gabe went to court 6 years ago for that bb gun incident!

The Teacher's Pet stood behind me and waved an ink stained paper napkin at me.  "I have a cheat sheet." she boasted.  I smiled but inside I hated her because I didn't think to do the same thing.

When it was my turn, I  hurried up to the booth and went to work doing my civic duty.  I vigorously filled in the bubble next to my choice of candidate for governor, shaking my booth and in the process shaking the entire line of flimsy voting booths.  I smiled apologetically at the woman next to me.  She was not very accepting and gave  me an accusing glare as she hid her ballot with her arm.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is an election, not an exam!  I'm not going to cheat by copying off of a stranger's ballot!  And even if I did, that should be considered a good thing because it would mean that the candidate would get more votes and a better chance of being elected! 

I was doing great for the first couple of races, but suddenly I was tossed a curve ball.  American Constitution Party?  Huh?  Who the heck is that?  Green Party?  Libertarian Party?  Good golly, where did they come from?  And the county elections were crazy... there was the usual ones, the race for Sheriff, Commissioner, Secretary and Treasurer... but then it started getting weird.  Surveyor, Assessor, Coroner?  Why do we have to elect who gets to figure out how dead people died?  I half expected to see a nomination for County Janitor on the ballot.  (Gabe used to sweep the County Coroner's office!)

When I finished coloring in my ballot, I dropped it in the counting box and walked across the room, past the growing line of fellow Americans who had come to cast their votes.  The line consisted of crisp suited business men, dust covered construction workers, sharply dressed professional women and their equally important Stay-At-Home Sisters... there were college students and coffee shop waiters, there were Soldiers and Airmen.  Even the election workers clad in Red, White and Blue and warm smiles came in a variety of sizes, shapes and backgrounds.  A diverse group of people for sure, with one thing in common, they CARE!

Now that the results are in am I happy?  Well, lets just say that not all of my candidates were victorious, but I am hopeful that the change will be for the positive.  DummyCrats, RubbishCans, Red, Blue or Green... Constipation Party, Librarians, 'ItDepend-ants'   It doesn't really matter to me the party, I pretty much detest all politicians now days, but its not about the politics, its about the results. 

A hearty 'thanks' to all of you who took the time to vote, regardless of your political affiliation.  Here's to a bright future for the country.