GOING POSTAL

I went to the post office yesterday to mail a package to Gabe.  There was a spring in my step and my box rattled of colorful jelly beans and crisply wrapped chocolate rabbits, cradled gently by a fluffy Easter Bunny dressed in a camouflage shirt and matching hat.  A card signed with love from all of the members of the family was placed in the box before it was carefully sealed.  Gabe was thousands of miles away in a land that doesn't observe our holidays and traditions so we were sending the holiday to him.  

I love the people at my post office, but I'm beginning to think the feeling is not mutual.  I swear to goodness golly that every time I step into that building, they look up at me and close down a counter.  It never fails... each and every dagnammit time I go there, I walk in the door, they see me and poof!  Break time!  Yesterday there were 3 clerks, and the line was almost out the door.  I step in, they smile and then there are only 2 clerks.  After waiting 30 minutes (yes, I timed it because they have a clock right there), and only 4 customers had been served since my arrival,  I gave up and relinquished my place in line so I could get back to work. 

This morning there were two clerks and two people in line.  The postal employees smiled and I dared them to leave the counter.  When it was my turn, I took the box I had so carefully wrapped and dropped it on the counter in triumphant determination.  The contents no longer rattled and crinkled but instead made a somewhat soggy thud.  I think I even caught the faint aroma of fruity chocolate.  The Easter candy had no doubt succumbed to the heat of the truck. 

"Are you a commercial shipper?" the clerk asks me.

"Yes, its just a coincident that my last name and my customer's last name are the same."

"Any liquids or perishables?" she asked automatically.

"I think the chocolate may have melted while I was waiting yesterday, but I'm sure the stuffed bunny will have soaked it up."

"This will take about 2weeks for delivery." she informs me.

"Two weeks and one day... I was here yesterday but you took your break when I walked in so I couldn't mail it then."

I hope Gabe can salvage something from the gooey mess that was to be his Easter basket.  And I hope he gets it on time.  His camp's mail-call is pretty good about deliveries.  They know how important mail is for the troops and even made deliveries on Christmas last year.

As for my post office folk, I love them, I really do.  I just wish they would get it out of their minds that I'm some kind of break announcer.  Keep the dang lines open when I come in, sheesh!  Work with me here people, I've got a son to send bits and pieces of home to.  Can I get a little bit of cooperation... please?