Tuesday, August 31, 2004

(IN BETWEEN LOADS OF DISHES)

While we're on the subject of birds... I was over at Globsblink's a while back and she mentioned something about a seagull dropping something on her.... I suggested looking at it in a positive view... at least bird turds don't smell as bad as dog doo does.... 

What!?  Come on, think about it folks, if bird-bombs smelled that bad would you still cheer for the Road Runner and little Tweety?  Would you have parakeets and lovebirds in a cage in your house?   We have geese and eagles... and pelicans... flying around here.  Do you know how big their stuff is?  Try imagine that falling on your head, and it smelling like Fido's uh-oh!  Maybe thats why cowboys and fishermen wear hats.. for protection from falling objects.  What about the Condor?  Those buggers have a wing span of up to 15 feet... thats huge!  Get hit by one of their presents and you'll wake up in the hospital. 

Nature of injury:  head trauma caused by gigantic bird-turd
Treatment:  clean area thoroughly with Lysol
Follow-up:  Next time use an umbrella!

And the next time one of you find a hairball, just be glad its just a hairball.  Birds of prey leave 'scat', which consists of hair, feathers, bones, teeth, and other undigestible by-products from their meal.  My daughter went to the nature center two years ago and brought home a ziplock baggie full of scat.  She asked if I wanted to see it.  Sure I said, I'd never seen scat before.  I didn't even know what it was, but she brought it home from the nature center so it had to be cute, right?  WRONG!  It was a bunch of tiny mouse and bird bones.  There was a little skull there!  Ewwwww!  And my daughter was picking through it telling me what everything was. 

Daughter!  I gasped... thats bird barf!  Put it down and wash your hands!  Why did you bring home bird barf?.... Of course they let you bring it home, they probably never had anyone ask to take some home before... cos its BIRD BARF!

Dang, its already 8pm.... and I still have a couple loads of dishes to do.  Why can't they make disposable pots?  Cook in them once and toss them away, no need to wash!  I know I kid about it a lot but I really REALLY do hate washing dishes.  REALLY!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I HATE WASHING DISHES TOO. AND I HAVE AN AUTOMATIC DISHWASHER DORN!! AND EVEN BETTER THAN THAT? I DONT CARE IF THE DISHES ARE DISPOSABLE OR NOT,,,,,IF THEY GET TOO HARD TO CLEAN,,,,,,THEY GET TOSSED!!! :)))))
GOOD ENTRY, AS USUAL. I ENJOYED THE PART ABOUT YOUR DAUGHTER BRINGING HOME "SCAT" FROM THE NATURE CENTER. TOO CUTE.
KIM.

Anonymous said...

Why does everyone spell my internet name wrong? Thanks for leaving a link........I think. :D Thanks for reminding me of that day dorn, it really...um...made my day. :\ (I'm being sarcastically angry to be funny, laugh girl, laugh!!!).

Blessings.

http://journals.aol.com/glopsblink/ATreasureTroveofGoodies

Anonymous said...

Add me to the list of dish washing haters too. hey, there's an idea for another clique. hee hee

Scat? ::shudder::