Today was not a social day. I need solitude on occasions such at this. I went to the ponds. The creatures there seemed to sense my sadness and they came up to offer their condolencenses. The deer, the squirrells, even the muskrat. But especially the mosquitoes.
They expressed their condolences all over my arms, neck and face. I thanked as many as I could with swift swats. Unfortunately the swats more often than not hurt me more than they hurt the mosquitoes.
I have over 3 dozen welts on my body. Thats 36+ for those of you, like me, who aren't too quick with the mental math and must rely heavily on a calculator. I feel ill. I'm not sure if its the virus de jour, stress due to current events, or an over dose of mosquito coodies. What ever it is the drugs and the alcohol aren't working. I ache and I feel a fever coming on. Grrrrrrrrrrr!
No word from Gabe since his cell phone message. Rumor has it he's suffering from a 3 day drunk. Can't say I blame him. I just hope he's sober enough when he sleeps to know that he's safe. I hope he was able to leave his nightmares behind in the sand.
A few friends here have asked for a little more detail about how my friend Rachelle died. . Rachelle was the victim of domestic abuse, violently killed by the man she had exchanged wedding vows with just 2 years earlier. Rather than post the details here I have uploaded a link which you may access if you would like.
Click here for Rachelle's story.
I would like to thank everyone who offered their condolences. I have dealt with death in the past, but never with the murder of a friend. This one will hurt for a long time and I am so fortunate to have such wonderful, supportive friends such as you. Thank you from the bottom of my mosquito bitten heart.
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16 comments:
Dorn, this entry and the last and the link -- you speak so eloquently at a time when you surely want to rage against the world. I wish there were more I could offer you during this sad and grief filled time in your life.
If only one of us could make it all better. Pray for the babies.
You're a good friend Dorn. She would be proud of you.
(((big comforting hug)))
Lahoma
That's what friends are for, Dorn.
I hope you are feeling a bit better,
and that the welts fade quickly!
xoxo,
H
There, but for the grace of God, go I. Rest in peace Rachelle.
You can't second guess yourself. Her husband had murder in his heart and probably would of shot more people just to get to her. Just remember her as she was, someday those little babies will want to know about their Momma...keep her memory for them. Sandi
prayers, love and hugs still being sent your way!
Becky
i do hope you find comfort here i care:) prayers for the families they all will need lots. Glad gabe is back on american soil:)
Deb
MY CONTINUES PRAYERS ARE FOR YOU ALL...GOD GIVE YOU REST AND PEACE AND COMFORT.
LOVE YA,
CARLENE
Thank you for the heartfelt description of her life and death. I wish there was a way to end all domestic violence. It is heartwrenching.
On a lighter note, my daughter went outside for 1/2 an hour and was covered in mosquito bites! Her little sister had one. Goodness.
Traci
What a terrible thing to have happen, I feel sorry for everyone involved but especially the babies so very sad.
hugs to you and prayers for everyone
Barbara
so sorry about your friend's passing in such a horrible way. Hope Gabe sobers up soon. LOL.
I read the entry you wrote it's so sad. Now those kids don't have any parents. How awful.
I found my way to your journal, no I am not a stalker either. So sorry to hear about your friend. It just is not suppose to happen that way. Thanks for the comments on my pictures.
Julie
http://journals.aol.com/midwestvintage/MyPhotoJourney/entries/2006/08/23/-random-shots/834
{{{ Jody }}}} I am so sorry, still. Please take Benedryl, you are having an allergic reaction to that many bites.
I lost a friend when I was 24, he was the victim of a hate crime against gay men. It was awful....
Prayers coming...
Go Gabe... sleep safely...
be well,
Dawn
(( JO ))
I am sitting here crying reading what you wrote... Please please do not blame yourself, That is the worst thing you could do. Thats what I did when I lost my best friend Alex 2 years ago and it got me so Depressed because I was so close he passed in Ft.Worth and I was just like 15 miles away in Arlington. Even though I didnt know him personally when his sister emailed me the directions to the funeral home I balled my eyes out sitting there graveside and I said there I know for almost an hour straight and cried my eyes out.
I still wonder to this day what he would be doing he would of been 18 this year on 11/7 if his Cystistic Fiberosis hadnt of taken his life.
Yes you are right Jo its gonna hurt for a long time.. I promise just take it day by day very slowly and Just keep thinking postive I know its hurts but thats what I had to do and it took me a long time to finally to Succum (sp?) that he was no longer here that he was 6 feet under.
Just please take it slow.....
Dont blame yourself this is not your fault !!!!!!! is a idiot that decided to take a precious womans life away because she was divorcing him and moving on with her life for the good...... HES AN IDIOT JO...
Instead of being mad BE PISSED OFF AT HIM for the stupid and very damn careless thing he did hon.
I promise Jo I will email you as soon as I get my blog back up I am waiting to hear back from Editor Joe if I will be able to keep my aol blog outside aol since I am not a member anymore.. Thanks to them *rolls eyes *
Please jo take it easy......
I mean it !
If you need anything feel free to email me here at my gmail address
(( HUGS)),
Christopher
Oh (((((((DORN)))))) I am so sorry to hear about your friend Rachelle!
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