What I want~

I've been flip-flopping worse than a Democratic senator on the hot seat but I think I've finally made up my mind, at least for today~

I don't want him to regret this any more than I can regret what led up to this end.  I don't need the satisfaction of saying "I told you so," since I never had the satisfaction of warning him in the first place.  I don't need to say "I was right and you were wrong." because I was never part of the discussion.  The decision was made for me and I was handed the results without choice.

All that I want is to know that every once in a while, whether he wants to admit it or not, he misses me.

If I can't have that then I'd at least like to stop missing him and what we once were~

In the mean time I'll just pull up a seat and make myself comfortable while waiting for the temperature in hell to drop....  Hey, a girl can dream can't she?

Hi, I'm 50, how are you?

Somehow, between accepting the inevitable and convincing family and friends that I was alright, I actually became a believer myself.  Somewhere along the way 50 ceased being a number and became a state of mind.  I have reached the top of the hill only to discover a mountain in the distance.  Life is full of wonderful surprises.  I intend on enjoying as many as I can while I can.

Next?!

IN PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS~

How sad is the person whose hunger is never sated, whose thirst cannot be quenched and whose longing is eternal. To be able to move forward without tainting your memories with regret is a blessing. To be happy, to be satisfied and content with what you have is a gift far greater than the temptation of ambition. A simple life is all I ever wanted and it was what I have achieved. 

I am happy. Are you?