Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Jubi-doo


What happens when a Shit-hound eats glitter? It lays shiny shit. We have shiny shit all over our back yard. Of course it's perpetual shit, Jubi ate the glitter and shat, then ate the glittery shit cos it was shiny and it tasted good(?) And then she shits the glittery shit, and then eats it again and... well, you get the picture.

And I have a shitty but glittery back yard.

Let me fill you in about our not so little basshit hound. For starters she has ADD... I didn't know dogs could have an attention deficit disorder. Jubilee cleared that misconception up real quick. She can't even pee without being sidetracked by a leaf blowing across the yard or a bug flying past. While her paws are some what clumbsy, she has velcro lips which suck in and latch on to anything within 6 inches of her jawls. She may only stand about 2 feet high but has a 4 foot reach. That means anything on the lower three shelves of the pantry, the bread box and the table are pretty much fair game when nobody is looking.

Jubi-doo is highly intelligent and is playing on our simple human minds. She does tricks for us, she can sit, and lay down. She shakes hands and gives high fives. More importantly, she has us trained to give her treats when she performs these silly little antics. But we love her for it and toss her a bacon-bit on command.

She is learning how to howl. So far she only does it by accident. So far it's still cute. I'm sure I will be fussing about it before long, but for now it really is quite adorable.


Summer is almost upon us. The Oompas only have a couple more weeks of school. I'm not dreading it that much this year. Perhaps it is because I'm pretty sure they will be gone most of the time. The girls both have steady boyfriends, and then there's their busy marching band schedule. Art hopefully will have a job by then and between that and time spent with his pink haired girlfriend he'll probably never be around either. Zack is seriously thinking about moving out to New York to help out on my sister's yak farm. And Gabe, who is now working in the same building as Dickidoo, is hoping to be out in his own apartment in a couple of months. My nephew will most likely be rejoining his family back east so it will just be Dickidoo, me....
Oh yeah, and the shit-hound!

4 comments:

garnett109 said...

She is a cutie!

Charley said...

I seriously think i threw up in my mouth a little at the poo eating!

Melanie said...

she is adoreable!!


Melanie

alphawoman said...

Ahhhhh, here you are!