Thursday, August 25, 2011

After-thoughts~

So, after sitting and thinking on it for a day I realize that perhaps my last entry may have been published a little hastily and without careful consideration.  Chances are he will read it.  And so might she.  She may be flattered... or offended.  If he hasn't seen it yet, he will after that.  There will quite possibly be no more invites to cook, no more free steak dinners.
And yet the entry remains~
Probably because even if I were to delete the words, the feelings remain the same.
I don't see how they can go on acting like nothing happened to anyone but themselves.  My whole world was knocked off of it's rotation, my future plans were discarded like yesterday's trash.  I sit in a bedroom that I share with my daughter, a dog and a cat, trying to stretch an $800 paycheck into $1000 worth of bills and failing miserably.  I can't even afford my own pride~
It would be so easy to just hit [Delete] and play along like everything is okay. Wedding vows, pahhhh! They are so over-rated, merely a mindless tradition. A simple click of a button before they see it and I can prevent so much additional grief. Yet I can't. Tonight I shall enjoy our last supper of sorts because when it hits, and it will hit, it ain't gonna be pretty.
It happened. Things changed.

And the entry remains.
(jab!)

2 comments:

Donna said...

Sometimes it just feels better getting it out of your system. I have little grudges against certain in-laws; I dare not specifically mention the problems in my blog, but a while back I sorta disguised the situations and changed the names and vented, and it felt so good. What felt even better was the possibility that one person might recognize herself in the entry.

Warm n Wonderful said...

Of course you own your pride. Hope things are looking up for you.