Dear Lou,

I am leaving this note here because it is the only way I know to reach you, if at all. I saw your interview a couple of weeks ago. To say that I was completely blindsided would be an understatement. I honestly had no idea you felt the way you did about this journal and the negative impact it has had on your life. I truly thought we were all on the same page. You were my biggest supporter, or so I thought. I would never have posted anything I thought would hurt, shame or upset any of you kids. Apparently I missed something along the way. I will not dismiss your feelings because I have always maintained that no one can tell us how we should feel or think. If you say that something I shared made you uncomfortable or upset, then I apologize. That was the last thing I wanted to do. I was going to delete Dust Bunnies, but at this point, the damage is already done. Being as until recently you were the only visitor here in years, I don’t think that any further damage can come from it. But again, that is just my opinion. The whole purpose of the journal was to keep family and friends abreast of what was going on with my own family and to serve as a record for the future. It was basically a group letter. Most of my 100 or so readers were relatives, but I eventually gained some random followers, several whom have since become what I consider personal friends. Dust Bunnies was a daily journal. There was no compensation of any kind other than the occasional comment from my readers. (The flintlocks were given to me by a black powder group that I was in at the time.) It was not a mommy blog anymore than it was a failed relationship blog or a cooking blog or a hunting blog, or a fart and burp, beer and coffee blog. It was a daily journal about my life. And yes, I mentioned my children, my (ex) husband, my job, my neighbors, and others. But it was really about me and my life at the time. I cannot erase the past or how I made you feel, but I can edit or delete the entries you find upsetting. That had always been an option while I was writing. If anyone had any objection (other than your father, who did object on occasion), to what I posted, I would edit or delete. I did so on a few occasions. I would have done so for every single one you asked me to. But that is water under the bridge now and I can only offer after the fact. I am so sorry for the way I have made you feel all these years. I only hope one day you will revisit your memories and see the good times, because there were some. You may not have had the childhood or the family you wanted, but it will always be a part of who you are and I believe that you are an amazing person. I obviously cannot take any credit for that, but I am very proud of you. I always have been and I miss you very much. Love you always, Mom ❤️