Wednesday, June 25, 2008

PRODUCT WRAPPERS and a new countdown of sorts.

I love to read.    I read novels and comics, cookbooks and greeting cards.  I read cereal boxes and shampoo bottles.  I read EVERYTHING!  Fantasy, fact, fiction, ingredients, anecdotes, technical hoo haa, I read it all.

Some are quite amusing, like the Glaceau Vitamin Water bottles (read them, they're hilarious!)  The Java Monster cans are pretty cool as well (I don't think they like Starbucks).  And recently my sister Redbird sent me some 'biscuits' she had picked up during a trip to Scotland with a cute nutritional warning.

Tesco Value Rich Tea Biscuits: 

Allergy advice: * Contains wheat, gluten, sulphites.  * Recipe: No nuts.  * Ingredients: Cannot guarantee nut free.  *  Factory: Product made in nut free area but nuts used elsewhere.

Suitable for Vegetarians.

Dove Promises are a favorite of mine.  I buy them not because they taste good and sooth my addiction, but for the inspirational sayings found on the inside of the foil wrapper.    Here, let me unwrap one now and share....  Oh crap, the bag is empty.  Who ate the last of my Dove chocolates?  Grrrrrrrrr!  How good of them to leave a wrapper.

"Smile.  People will wonder what you've been up to."

How ironic.  Well, this should be easy, I just need to look for the Oompa who is smiling... with smooth milk chocolate covered teeth!

Breath in... breath out.... Happy thoughts, happy thoughts.... Must not freak out over chocolate....

Okay, all better.  Now, where was I?  Ah yes.  Inspirational messaging on product packaging.  Guess what product wrapper these sayings decorate.

"Keep a cool head"

"Stop stressing, start focusing."

"Live fearlessly."

"Win or lose, play fair."

Nope, its not Gatorade.  Its not Nike or Reebok either.  Need another hint?

"Control your period, don't let your period control you."

Yeppers, the outer wrappers for Playtex Sport Tampons now come with assorted inspirational and motivational messages. 

Once I read them I got a whole new perspective on my time of the month.  I am woman, hear me roar!

Oh please!  Periods suck and I can't wait for menopause so I can be done and over with them.  "Keep a cool head", "Live fearlessly". Did a committee really sit around a table in some board room brainstorming for motivating slogans to get women excited about using a tampon?  And this was the best they could come up with?

Personally I can't think of anything that would make me feel better about my period... besides not ever having it again for the rest of my life.  The average age for menopause is 51.  That's just over 3 years away or only 39 more cycles.  That's all the inspiration I need.

And of course maybe some more Dove Promises.


sdoscher458 said...

If it doesn't kill you it only makes you must be steel. Lol. The people that did the ads for the tampons I think do Ebay's ads too...SHop Victoriously!!, Sandi

deshelestraci said...

I vote for a truckload of Dove Promises!  I really need some chocolate right now!

glensfork4 said...

too funny.....I had chocolate chips tonight - does that count?


garnett109 said...

I wish your family good luck with your menopause. LOL!

lazarai said...

Be careful what you wish for, Dorn!! I'm 51 now and three years POST-menopausal (started at 48-1/2!)....LOL. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy....but then again, I haven't had a period since I was 38 (had a partial hysterectomy, aka, a blessing in disguise!!!).

Actually, I think some of those tampon sayings would be great for condom wrappers: "Live fearlessly," "Keep a cool head." ROFLMAO!!!

Take care,
:) Carol

rdautumnsage said...

I can only imagine it would have to be a man's idea to put those saying on a tampon wrapper. It's a miserable experience that makes a woman turn into a nuclear warhead at the least little thing. If a woman had come up with a few headers they would read, "Breathe in, Breathe out, it'll all be over soon"..."They won't be the same people to you at the end of the week, remember they are NOT the enemy"..."Hide all sharp weapons"...No, I don't do that time of the month well, how did you guess? (Hugs)Indigo

wumzels2 said...

menapause is hell.  i have been over it for 8 years now, and things are mostly great........except for the unwelcome, unforeseen and painful spot period that happens about every 3 years.  i feel like someone picked up the can of tomatoes and shook it really hard to get the rest of the juice out of the can.....and they do it every 3 years, lol.

but i have to menapause is usually better than the aggravation of periods.

be blessed,