Tuesday, May 31, 2005

UNEMPLOYED BUT NOT JOBLESS

I am voluntarily unemployed.  Some people would see it as laziness, or the inability to hold a job.  On the contrary, I wanted to stay employed, and my bosses wanted me to continue working for them, but family priorities come first and I must consider what is best for the kids before I consider what is best for me.  I miss my paycheck.  I miss my friends.  I miss interacting with people my own age.  But the benefits to my children were immediately evident.  Zack graduated, Art and Becca pulled their grades up, and Rocky made phenominal improvements.  I do not have any regrets.

Dickidoo on the other hand may disagree.  I'm sure he hoped that along with being a SAHM (Stay At Home Mom) I would also fulfill the role of HW (House Wife).  Well, I'm his wife, and I live in our house, but thats about as close as it gets.  I hated cleaning while I was employed, and I still hate cleaning now.  I have managed to keep the dishes caught up, and I love having time to experiment and prepare hot, full course meals on a regular basis. Anything other than that sucks with a capital S U C K S

There has to be a better name to describe my role in society now.  Housewife is so outdated, and quite frankly it just doesn't fit.  SAHM sounds so... military, like I should have to report to some drill sgt. or superior officer.  I am not a domestic engineer, I am not a homemaker.  My job is to provide a stable environment for my family to thrive in.   I have no degree or formal education.  My training has all been on-the-job.   I am a doctor, a nurse, I am a teacher, a preacher, a couselor, I am a detective, a law enforcement officer, judge and jury.  I am a magician, a story teller, an artist and a musician.  I am a culinary wizard and a nutritionist.  I am a philosopher, a psychologist and an analyst.  I am an umpire, referee and mediator.  I demand fairness and yet I often practice blatant blind loyalty in regards to my offspring.  I am a gentle caregiver and yet can turn into a protective grizzley when my children are threatened.

So what am I?  What name, what one word can best describe me and the millions of other women like me through out the world?  What am I?  Tired comes to mind.  But seriously I am just being maternal.  I am a mother, plain and simple.  There needs to be no fancy title or silly acronym.  The pay sucks, but the benefits are fantastic and definitely worth it.  I couldn't think of a better job to have than being a mom !  (Except maybe a quality control specialist for Godiva Chocolates.... mmmmmmmmm!)

Godiva Chocolates  (hint, hint!)

15 comments:

sunnyside46 said...

yes, and a proud job it is ,too
Marti
http://journals.aol.com/sunnyside46/MidlifeMusings

brandyp0509 said...

LOL, I can so relate to all this.  I am still gainfully employed as I work from home doing transcription but for the most part I am a SAHM, which like you hate that term, it is very militant, lol.  I prefer to refer to myself (when not using mom, mommy, momma, mother or even hey you) as a Jackass of All Trades, lol.  Loved this entry!! Brandy

demandnlilchit said...

I consider myself "A stay at home goddess"lmaooooooo But I am always quick to add in "Lousy Pay- -Lousy hours" But it's a job I can do in my jammies if I want too!!!!! lol Somebody recently added up the cost of all the jobs a stay at home Mother does, and the cost would of been over 100K a year if they would of had to pay someone to do the cleaning, (the cooking, the errands, the repairs, the day care ect.(I'm still waiting for my first check! lol lol lol)

cneinhorn said...

very well said jodi!  I couldn't agree more, good news about the kiddies bringing their grades up!  

~ www.jerseygirljournal.com

mumma4evr said...

I am so relate!!!
Becky

sunflowerkat321 said...

You describe the job perfectly!!

schnozbeary said...

I understand..I hate the labels too and they don't go far enough to desribe the long term effects of our decision. I am so grateful now as my children are one by one leaving the nest. I feel a little guilty because I have had the honor and luxury to spend these last years with my kids...beautiful entry!! Penny

lreilly29 said...

I think you said it yourself in your last paragraph.....you need one word to sum up all of that?   MOM!      And.....I've always said - I'm not a housewife because I didn't MARRY the HOUSE!    (not to mention if you were to walk in my house you'd agree immed - I'm NOT a housewife at all!!!)

spunkyxmasangel said...

I'm at home with my 3 year old godson while his mom works and goes to school and I always feel like I need to explain it.  Somehow people feel lke if you're running a house,and I'm only 25 and it's my parents house,then there's something wrong with you.  I mean this job is horrible sometimes. No days off,no overtime and you can't put a price on it.  There's no ammount of money that's enough to pay women who work within the home for what we do.  It's the hardest job.
-Dawn-

southernmush said...

Hello. I recently came upon your journal and I saw this entry and I had to reply. I love, love, love, love, love chocolate. I love all kinds of chocolate except if its a bug covered in chocolate or liver coated in chocolate then its definitely a no brainer I won't eat it. Other than chocolate covered bugs or liver coated chocolates I will eat chocolate. I am a HUGE, HUGE, HUGE, HUGE fan of the chocolate industry. If I could be a quality control specialist for Godiva I would. I would like to make the guy who owns the Hershey company President of the United States if only he would run now there's an idea. I would definitely run to the polls to vote for that idea wouldn't you ?

ryanagi said...

Yup...this is me. Mother, but not cleaning woman. LOL I hate hate hate to clean. The house looks cluttered but just dandy to me, most days. ;-)

cpuertas said...

I have nothing but extreme admiration for you and my sister who are the only SAHM's I know exist. Your Job is harder than lets say mine... I am also a Mom and do most of the same jobs with the exception of Culinary Wizard .My title is Mom who works 2 jobs , never has a day off needs a husband so she can give up one job walks the dog way more than she cleans her house & is darned lucky that somehow or other her daughters are managing to thrive while they Take Care of Themselves... So keep up the good work ! I could never ever Stay at home longer than one weeks vacation!
you're Awesome and not plagued by Guilt bout not being home!


http://journals.aol.com/cpuertas/randommusings

angieabk said...

Dorn,

Been a SAHM myself for going on 2 years now.... BEST 2YEARS OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!
I have worked my entire adult life... I couldn't wait to "Quit working".  

I work harder now than I ever did for the US post office.

But that's okay.  You're absolutely right.  My kid deserves it.  My older two kids deserved it too and I feel like a crappy mom because I never gave it to them.  My youngest--in the last 2 years --has become more outgoing.. more open,.. more fun to be around.  Her grades went up and so did the quality of people she was hanging with.  She began in interest in extra-curricular activities in school that she never had before and I have time to be interested too!....  Wish I could have done all this for the other two.

Oh well.

Enjoy it!  It's the best thing that has ever happened to all of you!
angie

judithheartsong said...

there was nothing better than being at home with my kids and NOBODY could have paid enough money to provide all the things that I was able to give my kids when I stayed home.
Not everybody is cut out for the role, but I so admire you for doing what is right for your family.
judi

amiga1 said...

You go, gurl!