Tuesday, July 11, 2006

NEWS FROM GABE, and age released hair.

I got to talk with Gabe last night... woo hoo! The news was all good.  YES!  I wish I could elaborate for those who have been so supportive of Gabe and his buddies in Iraq, but this is all I can say for now.

I guess Dickidoo over slept again because all I heard from him this morning was a 'swoosh' as he tore out of the room, the slam of the front door and the rev of the Hemi as he drove down the street.  As for me... heck, I just rolled over and went back to sleep.  No doubt he'll come home and ask me if I heard the alarm go off.  (No), and then he'll accuse me of turning it off (I've actually caught him turning the alarm off just minutes before it was set to ring, and then he'll promptly go right back to sleep) followed by his declaration that he needs a new, louder alarm clock (There is absolutely nothing wrong with our alarm clock!  I'm going to get him a set of headphones for the alarm clock so he can crank it up as loud as he needs it but I won't have to hear it!).

It was the smell of coffee that woke me up.  (Thank you Art!)  Dickidoo doesn't think the kids should drink coffee, but I don't mind, especially if it means that there is a fresh pot on the Bunn-Omatic Brew-Omatic when I get up.

I've noticed lately that I've been scratching at the inside of my ears lately.  I'd haul out the Q-Tips and  gently wiped the outside of my ear, careful not to insert the swab into the ear canal as per the warning on the box (hahaha, yeah, right!).  But this morning I started to examine the irritation.  Could it be bugs?  No, because the tickle was always in the same place.  So what was it?  Thats when a thought dawned on me... a thought so dark that I can't even type it without shuddering....

I think I have....

Ear Hair!

Not those fine little hairs that keeps junk from getting into your ear drum, everyone has that stuff... No, I'm talking about those bushes of errant hairs that stick straight out of old men's ears, accounting for a good percent of their hearing loss.

And it doesn't stop there.  My eyebrows are getting way out of control as well.  I always seem to have one or two hairs that just seem to grow straight out of my brow.  And they aren't short ones either.  No, these guys are fricken LONG!   I have a theory about these growth enhanced, time released follicles. I think my pre-menopausal eye brow hairs mate with my hormonal nose hairs, and then multiply at a barely controllable rate.  I used to be able to maintain my errant hair once monthly but now its become a daily routine.  I fear that if I were to indulge in the luxury of sleeping in I may wake up looking like Chewbaca.  That in itself is enough to inspire me to get up on time.  But for those days when I'm in too much of a rush to do my morning mowing, Dickidoo has a little comb that came with his mustache trimmer.   A little hair gel, a little comb-over and tuck-under and I'm set for success!  I may look like I have a family of chinchillas living in my ears, nose and eyes, but hey, they're well groomed chinchillas! 

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Estrogen is such a cruel and evil master....

be well,
Dawn

ps... thanks for the laugh... I also get accused of turning off the alarm!! lol

Thank goodness Gabe is well...

Anonymous said...

glad you heard from gabe.  helps to know they are doing ok.

ahhhh yes...........those errant hairs that come from nowhere.........and stay.  i have a couple on each earlobe...........and have to let them grow to about 1/2 inch before i can locate and destroy.............just to have them back in two days.......the signs of getting old.........er.  

blessings..........

regina


Anonymous said...

so glad you heard from gabe :) yes those icky hairs i just got done doing my chin lol have a good tuesday

Deb

Anonymous said...

Oh, I have to laugh in sympathy.  I am getting the same problem but on my chin!  I can say, "Not by the hairs of my chinny chin chin!" and mean it!
So glad you heard from Gabe last night!
Traci

Anonymous said...

I remember when I was a teenager and Brooke Shields was all the rage.....and they were selling an eyebrow kit - complete with gel and brush - so you could have eyebrows just like hers....  I bought it but somehow my eyebrows weren't like hers....

Happy to hear Gabe is doing alright...

~Amy

Anonymous said...

Glad to here our hero is safe!

Anonymous said...

You are so funny!  Maybe we need to invent a small tiny lawnmower just for faces, ears and such. I'm happy you heard from Gabe, just a relief for you. My hubby and I argue over the alarm too....he keeps it so low I can't hear it and if I move it up in sound he jumps like a cat on a hot tin roof....funny to watch....Sandi

Anonymous said...

Lol maybe you could donate it to locks of love in a few months.

Anonymous said...

you crack me up. So happy you got to talk to gabe and he's doing great.

Anonymous said...

oh girl, thats nothing. wait until menopause sets in and you start getting whiskers and male pattern baldness. It's no laughing matter but, LOL!

Anonymous said...

I'm glad to hear Gabe's doing well, and it's the good news is great.  

That ear hair thing is hillarious.  I recently got a haircut, and when the lady with the clippers buzzed my ear lobe, I said "What the heck are you doing back there?"  It kind of freaked me out.  

-Dan

Anonymous said...

Whoa.....ear hair!  Ick!!! :-)  I'm not there yet, thank goodness! :-) :-)

Adrian

Anonymous said...

Ear hair. huh? And with a Q-tip? Shame on you! Sounds like somethin' I might do! (Feels GOOOOD, don't it?) Well, at least it's in an "easily-accessible location"! You know, no hand-mirrors needed? Oh, and BTW, the "safety swabs" with the oversize heads---Don't even try it! Not unless ya got a set of needle-nose pliers handy! Stick with the "old standby" Q-tip! And don't tell anybody I told YOU!!!