Saturday, December 16, 2006


I work in a retail super center.  I've braved the Post Office line, the mall, and extended holiday rush hour traffic.  Through it all my Christmas Spirit survived almost unscathed... until this morning. 

Oompa Rivalry... worse than any sibling rivalry I've ever seen.  FEMALE Oompa Rivalry.  Its the thing nightmares are made of.  Pre-pre-menopaus.  And after 12 years I had finally had enough.  I blew a gasket.  I yelled like I didn't know I could yell and then I slammed out of the house. 

As I reversed Big Red out of the driveway I used Santa's name in vain a record 10 times in one sentence.  Even as I spoke I could feel the spirit of the season slowly seeping out of my body.  It could be that my head wasn't screwed on quite right. It could be, perhaps, that my shoes were to tight.  (cough, cough... hack, hack... green hairball?)

Fortunately I was able to calm down before the metamorphosis into a Grinch was complete and decided to return Christmas to all of the little Oompas in Oompaville.

Awwwww, who am I kidding?  Christmas was always a magical time for me as a child but now, as a parent... even as an Oompa parent, the magic is so much more intense.

But I swear to goodness, if those girls pull another fit like they did today, they'll find out that no Christmas is coming.  They'll wake up and I know just what they'll do.  Their mouths will hang open a minute or two.  Then all of the Oompas down in Oompaville will all cry 'boo hoo'! "  Bah humbug!


coelha said...

Ooohh....  I remember the spats I had with my sister--it was ugly I tell you!!  I'm kind of glad my daughter doesn't have a sister--just brothers.  They don't fight over the same things, borrow eachother's clothes, shoes, friends, boyfriends...etc.....  I'm sorry you didn't turn into the Grinch! :)  Julie  

swmpgrly said...

oh those oompas better watch out, hes making a list and hes checking it twice.
It will be too fresh in santas memory now so he wont forget in a week.

leakylexion said...

Oh well. I suppose the Oophas had it in for them but try to not give in to it Dorn- you just might turn into the Grinch, really you will.

royallsgoddess said...

i hope those oompa's dont get cole in there stockings this year. that would be another fit you have to go threw. mouthhangs open an all.


glensfork4 said...

Bless your heart Jody....I know...It is almost here and over! I got some wonderful spirit today I was truly blessed. The girls better behave....

princesssaurora said...

No you won't... you will still give them Christmas... it it what us mommies do.  Ugh.  I hear ya with the bickering... ugh.

be well,