HOMEWORK

My 12 year old daughter asked me to help her with her homework and naturally I was happy to help.  I dropped what I was doing and went to see this math problem that had her confused. 

'Hey... I thought you said math!'  I accused.  She informed me that it WAS math, it was algebra.  Well, from what I remember math was numbers.  Reading and writing were the ones with alphabets.  When I was in school 1+2 =3.  In her algebra book y+z =3.  Huh?  I'm sorry, but no wonder kids now days are so confused!

Do you remember when the subjects in school all had names with 2 or less syllables... like Art, Math, Science, Reading, Writing...  Now they have names like Triganometry, Calculus...   Do kids even need to know this stuff?  I've been alive for almost 44 years now and I've never had to use triganometry or calculus.  I don't even know how to spell them let alone what they mean!

And what do kids need $100 scientific calculators for.  In my time using calculators was CHEATING!  You could get suspended for using them! Last year my daughter learned 'estimating'.  She asked me to help and we worked out the exact answers the old fashioned way.  She got them all wrong, because she didn't estimate.  The teacher didn't want the correct answer, she wanted an estimation of the correct answer, and there for the correct answer was incorrect.  Does that make sence?  Nope, it didn't to me either.

Thats okay though cos my 3 sons, who are smarter than me because they can spell math problems, are willing to be bribed to help their sisters in times of crisis like tonight.  Math indeed!  Those are letters Professor!  Letters are for spelling words!  Numbers are for making amounts!  When was the last time you went into the store and tried to buy some milk, and the cashier told you... "Well, your estimated total is 1x+y dollars.  Will that be cash or credit?"

COVER-UP.... THE ALIBI

My last entry was supposed to be a filler while I waited for my dishes to wash themselves.  It ended up being about bird turds and barf.... Bad BAD!  I'll never get picked at this rate, and I think the TOS agents are getting nervous about my constant references to those and other bodily functions so I am attempting to steer clear for a while.  Its going to be hard, and un-natural, kind of like asking a comedian to write a eulogy... but bear with me folks, I've got a lot riding on this.

Here we go:

Have you ever noticed how kids always have an alibi for everything?You don't even have to finish the sentence.... they don't even have to know the time in question or the crime committed, they have an alibi!  Maybe dads teach them the art of alibi-ing as soon as they can talk because it seems husbands also have the gift.  So, in a deparate effort to draw attention from my last entry, lets see how good you are with an alibi based on this partial sentence: 

"WHERE WERE YOU AND WHY DID YOU DO IT?"

THE SUSPECTS:
Dorn:  Hey man, it wasn't me, I was in the bathroom laying a turd. If you don't believe me, go take a whiff!

MzGoochi:  Um, um, Um..I don't know...Okay I confess! Dorn made me do it, I swear she did! Her and Rocky threatened me with dish duty and scat!

Emfeasel:  (doesn't look good... you might want to think about getting a lawyer right about now!)

Kimbellina:  IT COULDNT HAVE BEEN ME, I'M SCARED OF THE DARK, AND HIGHLY ALLERGIC TO BUTT FUMES!!!! LOL!!!!!!

Sdoscher:  It was somebody who LOOKED like me....if you run fast you can catch her she's climbing out a bathroom window! hehehe

Ryanagi:  It couldn't have been me. I never go in there or touch that!

  Glittercat:  Sounds like a conspiracy to me, they were all involved lol............. by the way i wasn't there !!! << whistles innocently climbing out of the window lol >>>

 

(IN BETWEEN LOADS OF DISHES)

While we're on the subject of birds... I was over at Globsblink's a while back and she mentioned something about a seagull dropping something on her.... I suggested looking at it in a positive view... at least bird turds don't smell as bad as dog doo does.... 

What!?  Come on, think about it folks, if bird-bombs smelled that bad would you still cheer for the Road Runner and little Tweety?  Would you have parakeets and lovebirds in a cage in your house?   We have geese and eagles... and pelicans... flying around here.  Do you know how big their stuff is?  Try imagine that falling on your head, and it smelling like Fido's uh-oh!  Maybe thats why cowboys and fishermen wear hats.. for protection from falling objects.  What about the Condor?  Those buggers have a wing span of up to 15 feet... thats huge!  Get hit by one of their presents and you'll wake up in the hospital. 

Nature of injury:  head trauma caused by gigantic bird-turd
Treatment:  clean area thoroughly with Lysol
Follow-up:  Next time use an umbrella!

And the next time one of you find a hairball, just be glad its just a hairball.  Birds of prey leave 'scat', which consists of hair, feathers, bones, teeth, and other undigestible by-products from their meal.  My daughter went to the nature center two years ago and brought home a ziplock baggie full of scat.  She asked if I wanted to see it.  Sure I said, I'd never seen scat before.  I didn't even know what it was, but she brought it home from the nature center so it had to be cute, right?  WRONG!  It was a bunch of tiny mouse and bird bones.  There was a little skull there!  Ewwwww!  And my daughter was picking through it telling me what everything was. 

Daughter!  I gasped... thats bird barf!  Put it down and wash your hands!  Why did you bring home bird barf?.... Of course they let you bring it home, they probably never had anyone ask to take some home before... cos its BIRD BARF!

Dang, its already 8pm.... and I still have a couple loads of dishes to do.  Why can't they make disposable pots?  Cook in them once and toss them away, no need to wash!  I know I kid about it a lot but I really REALLY do hate washing dishes.  REALLY!

TOOSDAY

Okay, its Tuesday and you all know what that means.... I have the day off and the house TO MYSELF!  I already took a long, uninterrupted shower, I had a whole pot of coffee, didn't have to share that either... I wrote a serious entry on my journal without anyone harrassing me for food, I took a drive that didn't involve a lot of stops costing me half the week's grocery budget, and now I'm back home again, and its still quiet!

The mailman was being nice today, no bills!  Just as well because my checking account balance is just about to turn back to two digits.  I do have a meeting today, at 2 o'clock, but I still have time to jump into the hot tub first.

We have a flock of pelicans that vacation during the summer in the pond down the way from the house.  They first started showing up about 5 years ago, and missed only one summer.... last year.  I was afraid they had found a new nesting area due to the drought, but this year brought lots of rain and they came back.  Did you know that pelicans fly in a V formation like geese?  I found that out one summer when they were flying in to the pond.  I thought they were deformed geese at first, but as they got closer I realized that they were in fact pelicans.  They are so awesome and graceful in the air and on the water, but to watch them do that 'waddle walk' on land is just halarious.  Today was the first time I've ever been able to get close enough to get a decent photograph.  This little guy (he's one of the smallest and is probably only a year or so old) was the only one awake enough to venture out onto the pond.  The others were all stretching and sunning on the mudbank.

Okay, enough with the red to's.  What can I say, I've got a lot of spare time on my hands today and I don't know how to act!  Hehehehehe!

SAD ANNIVERSARY and BIRTHDAY

Once upon a time there lived a very special young man who was very close to my heart.   For my oldest boy he was the big brother he never had, and for my husband and I he was like a son.  We met through our mutual love for hunting and the outdoors.  Our families were always sharing meals and events.

One day he was at the house after a Reserve drill and found my son's beaver pelt, and rubbed his face in it.  "I love beaver fur" he said with appreciation.  "I need to get a beaver, I've never had one and it feels soooooo good".  I just stood there laughing so hard and he thought I was nuts!  Another day he came into the house and found Rocky running around in one of my longsleeved teeshirts and one of her brother's sweatpants.  He wrestled her to the ground, then tied the sleeves and extra-long pant legs together so she couldn't move.  That was the last time I could keep up with Rocky.

After almost a year in the Reserves Nolan enlisted in the regular Army.  What happened after that is still in question.  We know he suffered a heat injury while awaiting placement in bootcamp.  We know the severe sunburn to his freshly shaven head went untreated except for some cream from the clinic.  We know that the area he was training in was experiencing heat wave conditions at the time.  We know he sought help from the doctors and chaplin after he started experiencing confusion and other problems once his basic training began.  We know the Red Cross was contacted by his family.  We know his buddies went to the 'leaders' to voice their concerns.

We know that Nolan sought help.  We know that he did not receive any.  We know that Nolan ended his life on August 29, 2000.   We don't know why.  And we don't know HOW this could have been allowed to happen.  Theres so much more to this story that I can't go into.  So much good has come from it because of the determination of his father and family and because of the determination of others in high places who have recognized the tragedy and refuse to allow it to repeat itself with another young life.  We will never know of the heartaches that have been averted because of changes made through these efforts for improvement.... but oh, the price was great.  Nolan would have been 23 today.  He should have been eatting cake with his family.  Instead, they sit at a table with an empty chair and share the memories of a life that ended too soon.  Yes, a very sad day indeed.

Soon my own son will be joining the military and leave for bootcamp.  I can't tell you how worried I am that something might happen to him. Oh, he's a strong boy, a smart boy.... nothing will happen to him... but so was Nolan.  Its hard, but I must have faith in all of those involved to bring my boy safely back.  Back for what?  To go into battle?  I remember as a teenager vowing never to have children because I didn't want them to have to see the face of war.  I'm glad that I changed my values over the years for now I have 5 great kids.  It is with great sadness that I must raise them in time of war.  But I know that Nolan will help to watch over my children in spirit as he did in person.  Happy Birthday Nolan.

BUBBLES

Hot tubs are great, aren't they.... cos you never really know where the bubbles come from.

NOT SUCH A BAD DAY AFTER ALL

Rocky had a bad start this morning.  She got up late, couldn't find her book, didn't have time for breakfast, the older kids had snatched everything she had hidden for her sack lunch, and she was experiencing a really REALLY bad hair day.  When I dropped her off at school a few minutes ago she wasn't her usual happy self.

Rocky:  Its going to be a bad day, I know it.

Mom:  Well, if something bad happens, just think that it could have been worse, so thats a good thing.

Rocky:  No, I mean REALLY bad!

Mom:  Well, if something bad happens at school, just be happy if they don't call your dad.

Rocky:  What if they DO call daddy?

Mom:  Then be glad that they didn't call the police.

Rocky:  What if they call the police?

Mom (sencing that this could go on all morning):  Then be glad they didn't call the Army.

Rocky:  But what if they do call the Army?

Mom (looking at the clock as the other kids are disappearing into the school building): Then be glad they didn't call in the Marines.

Rocky:  But what if they DO call the Marines?

Mom:  Then you're on your own buddy, and if you don't get moving I'll call the Marines myself!

That got her moving and she ran off to class laughing, signing as we always do... 'I love you', People think one of us is deaf or mute, and they think the whole signing routine is sweet.  The four part sign is as follows..... 'I love you' (Am. Sign Language),  'Shaka' (Hawaiian greeting), 'Peace' (you know, the old 2 finger deal), and lastly.... the Vulcan greeting!  We do this every time we part.  Silly huh?

FAMILY PORTRAIT

Just wanted to share this with you, its an original oil painting done for us by a Korean artist.  She took a bunch of photographs we had and put them together on one canvas.  Pretty cool huh?  Ohhhhh, and that picture of me... it was taken back when I was 35 and my boobs still pointed to the east or west (and occasionally north)  instead of south like now days.

NUTRITIONAL FACTS

I was real good with my healthy eatting today.  For breakfast I just had two cups of coffee.  I snagged the last of the Irish Cream creamer, so my husband only had one cup.... you snooze you lose!  For brunch, which is my first break at work... 11am... I had a muffin and a Yoplait Strawberry and Banana Yogourt Smoothie, which is better than that thing I had for breakfast the other day... but it still feels like snot.  And wouldn't you know, thats what I call it... strawberry snot!  Why? you ask... well, if strawberries had noses, that is what their snot would feel and taste like!  Makes sence to my co-workers and so thats what they call it now.  I don't think Dannon and Yoplait will be contacting me for any customer appreciation awards though.

So anyhow, I had one of those strawberry snot drinks and a muffin.  The label on the bottle said 'breakfast smoothie', and listed all of the vitamins, minerals and other nutrients on a neat little Nutrition Facts chart.  Just about everything was at least 25% of the DV (daily value).  Cool!  I could drink 4 of these and have everything my body required for the day!  Of course my ... regularity... would be a little... shall we say moist?  And it would probably smell like strawberries!  Good thing I grabbed a muffin!  We need to get a little fiber and roughage in there!  I started reading the package of the muffin as I ate it.  Servings = 2.  Huh?  The muffin was 2 servings?  What the heck, do they really thing someone intentially buys these muffins and says.... 'well, this should cover breakfast for 2 mornings!'  Heck no!  And I ain't sharing either!  Can you imagine going into a restaurant and ordering a muffin.... only to have them bring out just half a muffin, because that is what a single serving is?  Utterly ridiculous!

By that time I was mad, and I ripped the top off of my blueberry muffin... and everyone at the table started laughing at me.  Haven't they ever seen someone eatting a muffin the way a muffin was supposed to be eatten... top first?  And don't anyone even thing about taking my other serving!  I ate the whole fricken muffin (they make the calories look reasonable... 210... but thats PER SERVING!  I ate the whole muffin, which was 2 servings, so the muffin was 420 calories!  Agh!  I quit!

And now, here I am, safe at home at last.  My stomach is growling... I mean its really growling, as in MAD growling because all its had today was the stinkin' strawberry snot and 2 servings of blueberry muffin.  So I console it with a Corona Extra.  There are no nutrition facts printed on the bottle of Corona.  Imagine that!  Ahhhhh, life is good again!

WHY I EAT WHAT I DO, THE WAY I DO

 When I was a kid my mom would serve artichoke for dinner when ever we could afford it, one of each of us.  My dad used to tell us that the hairy 'choke' would choke us, and being the kind and caring father that he was, he'd let us eat the leaves and then he'd take the bottom half of the artichoke and eat it himself, that way if anyone choked, it would be him and not one of us kids.  We just knew he loved us to make that kind of sacrifice!

It wasn't until I married and moved away that I discovered the truth... the heart of the artichoke is what is below the 'choke', and all those years my dad was scarfing all the best!  I tried the same tactic on my kids but they're so gutsy they don't care and they eat it all! 

I don't eat liver, why should I?  Do you know what the liver's function is?  It filters all the toxins before they get into the body's system.  So why would you want to eat it?  Its full of toxins folks.  I don't care if its cooked, its poisonous!  I'd rather lick my cast iron skillet than eat liver (by the way, cast iron cookwear do provide iron to your diet if you cook in them....).

I love ice cream, but the real stuff makes me.... loose.  I used to eat ice cream for breakfast when I was a kid on days that I didn't want to go to school so I'd get the runs and have to stay home (I never lied to my mom).  It worked every time and I had a clear conscience.

I love hotdogs, but not red hotdogs.  When I was in the 2nd grade we had red hotdogs for lunch.  Then a little boy behind me got sick and hurled allllllll over the class.  The smell hung in the classroom for the rest of the school year.  Ever since that day, every time I smell a red hotdog I am immediately transported to that place in time, and I cannot even touch the offending weiner let alone eat it.

WHY IS HE SCREAMING?

Okay folks, I know there is already a caption deal going around in the journals, but here's a twist, suggested by none other than my Darling Dickidoo!  He read my take on why Edvard Munch's model was screaming in the painting titled The Scream (of course!), and he came up with his own...  It was so funny that I thought I'd throw it out and see what you folks think the guy in the painting is screaming about.  This is not a contest, just something for a little fun.  Give it a try.

Dickidoo:  Agh! Where'd that dog chit come from?  (hahahaha!  It wasn't me this time, that was Dickidoo!)

Dorn:  I'm melting... melting... melting!

Cnabarry04:  "Madame Glinka in Europe with no sparkly gowns!"

Pengboo:  "Oh...the agony.  I knew I wouldn't like thong underwear!!"

Demandnlilchit:  "Macaulay Culkin on Crack"   (home alone movie)

Mzgoochi:  I think he was on a suicide mission and just realized the world isn't flat afterall. Back to the drawing board. hee hee

Ladydriversammie: I think he's running from those people behind him and is cupping his hands to try and make himself heard outside of the painting.  Maybe they're trying to kill him.

Spurgins:  I think he is an alien and is scared because he has been seen by humans! He is trying to scream, but can't because he realizes he has no vocal cords.
After coming to this conclusion he jumps off the bridge and his spaceship awaits...swoops him up, takes off and he is headed back to uranus.
hahhahaha

Cneinhorn:  Oh No! I forgot to add the fabric softener...

Aiibrat:  he's on vacation & suddenly realizes: Oh My God, I forgot my Honey.  Oh Boy, I'm going to be in trouble when I get home. 

Sdoscher:  He just found out he is not a Piccaso!

Shelly:  Cuz he keeps getting stolen.

TREE CLIMBING LESSONS

I found the cutest hand written sign on the bar this morning.  It was written in pen and yellow crayon, advertising Tree Climbing lessons.... (snack included)  All day sessions were marked down from 25¢ to 10¢.  Well, that explains all the kids in the tree.  I just hope Rocky returned all their lesson fees after I chased them all out.  (That tree is at least 25 feet tall, I don't need someone falling out of it!)

I was watching the Olympics last night.  I came in during the womens relay.  I couldn't believe what they were wearing... or more specifically what they WERE NOT wearing!  It looked to me like they were running in just their underwear!  Sports bras and panties, nothing else.  In fact, I doubt there was anything else under them!  At this rate they'll be showing up at the next Olympics in just pasties and thongs!  But oh my goodness, those ladies could run!  I couldn't believe how fast they were running!

I tried running at work yesterday.  It was funny.  Things started flying out of my pockets, and then I had to cross my arms over my chest so I wouldn't knock myself out with my flopping boobs.  I was glad I had that pad on cos my bladder wasn't liking the high impact workout at all!  Note to self:  NOTHING at work is worth running to!

BREAKFAST OF THE CHAMPIONS

Most days I don't even bother with breakfast.  Last night I went to Sam's to get stuff for the kids lunches and decided to get something healthy for myself.  This morning I had a smoothie with my coffee.  My stomach rebeled when the slimy sweet stuff hit my gullet.  It hollered 'hey, if you're even gonna bother to feed me, give me something with substance, I'm not geriatric YET!'  Okay, actually what it really said was 'Grrrrrrrr iggggyyyyyy iiiiiiiiiggggggggyyyyyy ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww', but I'm sure that was what it meant. 

I'm trying to live a healthier lifestyle.  I eat faster so that I spend less time eatting, I actually WATCH what I eat instead of watching TV while I eat,  I watch more sports, and I drink 6.0 beer so I don't have to drink as much to get a buzz.  Now my little girl wants me to do yoga?  I don't know.... I'm sure yoga was not intended for middleaged women with a baggie butt and droopy boobs... our sence of balance is waayyyy off!  I'm beginning to think I was destined to look like a Weeble, theres no blowing me over, thats for sure!  At least I don't look like a Barbie, walking around on tiptoes so when the wind blows she tips over and her perfect boobs stick in the ground.... (Ken, darling, a little help here please?)

FLIES and other annoyances

Don't know for sure where they're coming from, but there are dozens of flies buzzing around the house.  I wonder if the front door being left open all afternoon has anything to do with it?  The flypaper is finally catching something besides careless humans.  I'm sure the insect equivalent to PETA (PETI ?) would protest, but I get a certain sence of satisfaction when I see those nasty flies glued to that fly strip.  I feel bad when I hear them buzzing though, and go over to make sure none of them are little science experiments gone terribly wrong... with little human faces and sad little human cries for help...  Yes, I admit, I watched too much sci-fi as a child and every version of The Fly was my favorite!

We have 5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, a kitchen, dining room, livingroom, den, foyer, a laundryroom and 2 hallways.  The bedrooms and laundry room are the only rooms in the house that have all of the lights working.  The kitchen flourescent lights are burned out so we use the stove light to cook by.  I don't do dishes after dark. Half of the lights in the den are out, none of the livingroom lights work.  Until lastnight only one of the chandelier lights in the diningroom worked, it was like eatting by candlelight.  Half of the bathroom lights are burned out.  The lights on the foyer ceiling fan are burned out except for one, the back porch light is burned out and the screws are rusted on so we couldn't change it if we wanted to.  I never really notice the lights not working until night time, and by that time its too dark to find the lights... so we just wait until daylight... and forget again because we don't need the lights on then. 

We have a drip in one of the bathrooms.  It only drips at night.  We can be in the house all day and not hear a thing, but the moment we get in bed, there it is, a constant, deafening drip, drip, drip! I used to put a bucket under the faucet to catch the water, but then the drip echoed.  We tried tightening the faucets and washers, but they must be as old as the house, which is almost as old as me, which means theres no fixing those drips!  I guess we'll be replacing some plumbing come spring.  This really sucks because my spring cleaning listfor next year is getting longer and longer, and I haven't even finished this years list yet!  Oh yay!  I'm soooo excited, can you tell?

Viewer Discression Advised:(cover your eyes now if you are modest, easily embarassed or offended by discussion about the female menstral cycle... or are an AOL Editor considering my journal for a future feature) I am no longer a virgin... again!  And, wouldn't you know, its that time of the month.  Ol Auntie Flo has the worst timing, doesn't she?  Why is it that some guys take it so personally, huh?  News flash... women can't menstrate at will!  Heck, I don't even enjoy it, so why would I wish it upon myself?  Trust me guys, there nothing fun about strapping a super duper diaper between our legs and walking around looking like a kid with a prize in his pants for a week... And do you really think we enjoy Tampax? Hello...NO! It was almost worth getting pregnant just so I wouldn't have to deal with it for 9 months.  Believe it or not I'm actually looking forward to menopause just to be done with this!  I just pity anyone around me when the hot flashes start flashing and my mood swings start swinging! EDIT: This was always an issue in the Dickidoo vs. Boobidoo wars, but not yet with the New and Improved Dickidoo (in other words, I just started my period 5 minutes before I wrote this so he doesn't know... hehehehe)

Okay, you can uncover your eyes now.  I'm done. And check it out, no pee/ poop/ burp/ fart/ or snot stories! Think I'll make #1? 

THE SCREAM

This is a copy of a painting by Edvard Munch entitled "The Scream".  It is one of the most famous paintings in the world and is worth millions of dollars.  It was recently stolen from a museum in Oslo by 2 or 3 armed robbers.  Security guards aren't quite sure how many robbers there actually were and therefore they were too busy trying to determine the exact number  and were unable to make any attempt to stop the 2 or 3 robbers. 

This is the second time in 10 years that 'The Scream' has been stolen.  In 1994  the 2 or 3 different robbers demanded 1 million dollars ransom.  They did not receive the money because while the painting was famous, it wasn't good, let alone worth 1 million dollars!  After 3 months the robbers got sick of looking at the goofy painting and it was recovered in a hotel room undamaged.

When I look at paintings like 'The Scream', and any one of Picasso's paintings, I wonder what exactly people were on back in those days to paint like that.  Maybe the fumes from their paint thinner was really potent or something.   Then, for decades after people are still ooooooooohhing and aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhing over them.  Why?  Fumes maybe, even after all these years?  Well, if you ask me.... they suck!  I would have gotten an F for turning in a painting like that in art class!  'The Scream' was probably a follow-up painting that Munch did after the model saw the first painting... and started screaming!  Munch probably told the model... 'wait, hold that scream, people will pay millions of dollars for this painting long after we are dead!"  I've got more talent hanging off of my refrigerator door, watercolors and pencil drawings signed by my 5 children.  Stick those in a gallery and sell them for a million dollars, cos they are REAL art!

 

KER-PLUNK!

Have you ever played Ker-Plunk.... in the kitchen?  Its like Jenga.... with dirty dishes.  I have the 'Wash As You Need Them' policy in effect for dirty dishes and we always have a huge stack of dishes on the counter and in the sink.  And wouldn't you know it, what ever it is that I need is ALWAYS on the bottom of the stack.  The trick is to extract that utensil or dish without toppling the rest of the stack onto the floor.  The loser cleans up the mess and has to wash the rest of the dishes.

UGLIEST BABY IN THE WORLD

Now isn't this a face only a mother could love?  Fortunately the kids didn't take after him too much, none of them were born with goatees although Gabe now has one and Zack is working on it.  Art is so proud of his peach fuzz, but Becca and Rocky are hoping they didn't inherit those particular genes, but they have a bottle of Nair on stand-by just in case.

FYI: I cannot take credit for this picture.  It was taken at the base Shoppette from one of those little kiosk things.  And the shark picture below was taken at Circus Circus in Las Vegas.

(yes, thats really Baby Dickidoo,  hehehehehe... and once again, now that we've made up I'm going to be in soooo much trouble again!)

ALL IS WELL IN BUNNY-TOWN

I just wanted to update everyone who has been so supportive during the Battle of the Sexes.  My guy finally apologized to me, and I to him ( I didn't apologize because I was wrong... I'm NEVER wrong...hehehehe... it just seemed like the thing to do at the time.) so things here are back to their normal chaotic state of disorganization.  You know, who ever said 'Love means never having to say you're sorry' was an idiot and should be shot.  Its all about saying you're sorry!  And if you don't say you're sorry to me... buddy, you WILL be sorry!  Never saying you're sorry, bull chit!  I have to say though, my guy apologizes soooo very nicely!  Makes me almost wish he'd so something wrong just so he could apologize again!  Almost... but not quite.  This past few months was real rough and I really appreciate the support you all gave me. 

Of course, he's still a Dickidoo... but thats okay, cos I'm still a Boobidoo!  Hahahahahahaha!

DINNER CRUISE

This picture was shot in Vegas while we were passing through.  Notice how Art appears to be feeding his sisters to the shark?  Yep, thats brotherly love.  Really, it is!  Cos that way he could save his big brother Zack, who seems to like the idea.  Trust me, it wasn't long before the Great White spit Rocky and Becca back out, he didn't like 'junk food'.  Hehehehe!

NEAT-O WOW SURVEY

I did this survey a long time ago, even before J-land was discovered, but I thought it would be fun to do again.  Thanks to Headin' South and Miss Kitty for hooking me up with it again.  (I love surveys, its the only time I get all the answers right!)

1. What color are your kitchen plates?
Uhhhh, hang on a second, let me wash one and I'll check.

2. What book are you reading?
"Dustbunnies for Dummies"

3. What's on your mouse pad?
Mossy Oak Camoflaug (compliments of RealTree)

4. What's your favorite board game?
Axis and Allies, but I'm a sore loser and end up blowing up the winners so nobody will play with me anymore.

5. Favorite magazine?
Newsweek (yes, really!)

6. Favorite smell?
The  Pacific Ocean

7. Least favorite smell?
The sanitation treatment plant down the way on a hot summer day.

8. What's the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
"How much longer can I lay in bed before I have to HAVE TO get up..."

9. Least favorite color?
Chartruse (puke green)

10. How many rings before you answer the phone?
2... I don't want to seem too desparate for company.

11. Future child's name?
Jesus2, cos the only way thats ever gonna happen is through some act of God!

12. What is most important in life?
Life is so fragile so I try to live each moment like its going to be my last... no regrets!  So if I snag the last piece of cheesecake, forgive me because I may never get another piece before I die!

13. Favorite sound?
Got 2 favorites.... the sound of the rain, and the sound of children (preferrably sleeping children)

14. Chocolate or vanilla?
I graduated from Chocolate to Vanilla last year.

15. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?
Kind of... my husband is overstuffed and somewhat of an animal.  And I do have a favorite grasshopper thing that I use as a pillow sometimes.

16. Storms: Cool or scary?
 I love storms!

17. What type of car was your first car?
'65 Mustang, but I didn't have my license yet so I didn't get to drive it before my husband broke it and sold it.

18. If you could meet one person dead or alive?
I would definitely rather meet a person who was alive than someone who was dead.  One person I wish I could have met before he died was John Denver, my favorite poet.  I would like to meet Maya Angelou.

19. What's your birthday?
September 13.... AD... (after dinosaurs)

20. Do you eat the stems of broccoli?
Everything but the roots!

21. If you could have any job, what would it be?
I would love to just drive around and take photographs... and get paid for it!

22. If you could have any color hair, what would it be?
I kind of wish I could have the hair I did when I was a teenager... it was streaked from the sun and was so pretty.  People actually used to ask me where I got it done, they couldn't believe it was natural.  Now they believe... my streaks of gold and copper are white and silver.  FYI I've never colored my hair before, but may some day soon, so people at work will quit pulling out my white hairs.

23. Have you ever been in love?
Only once, and I married.  I don't think I could go through this twice.

24. Is the glass half full or half empty?
Half empty... how 'bout topping it off for me?  Or... half full, don't stop, fill'er up!

25. What are your favorite movies?
Oh... HORROR FLICKS!  Haven't seen any really good ones lately though.

26. Do you type with your fingers on the right keys?
Yea, but it slows me down.  I took 2 years of typing in high school, then worked as a typesetter after I graduated... so its kind of a bad habit of mine.  (back then 55 wpm was considered good, can you believe that?)

27. What's under your bed?
Need you ask... 8 generations of Dust Bunnies of course!

28. What's your favorite number?
13, the day of my birth (plus I like to be contrary).

29. What's your single biggest fear?
I fear only the thought of outliving any of my children.  That and being forced on a low carb, low fat, low cholesteral diet.  Heck, I'm only 5'2, isn't that low enough?

30. Say one nice thing about the person who send this to you.
I stole this from some other journals, but I linked them so maybe they'll forgive me. 

31. Favorite CD?
John Denver's Greatest Hits

32. Pen or Pencil?  (this was on the original one I  did)Pencil... I make a lot of mistakes, but I still like to be neat.

33. Hamburgers or hotdogs?
Hamburger, from the grill, with cheese, mustard, lettuce, tomato and onions... and a bun of course, not of those silly Burger King bunless burgers for me!

34. Favorite soft drink
Dr. Pepper straight, Coke as a mixer

35. The best place you have ever been?
Camp Pupukea, in Hawaii's North Shore. I used to spend hours up there under the ironwood pines with the wind playing harmony to my guitar.

36. Screen saver on your computer right now?
No screensaver, but my wallpaper is Remington, with a black lab on a boat with duck decoys.  My secondary wallpaper (yes, I switch according to my mood) is a Corona beach scene.)

37. Cat or dog?
Ferret?  But I want a dog soooo bad!

38. White holiday lights or colored holiday lights?
Colored lights, and then when I take my glasses off they glimmer like jewels.