Tuesday, May 11, 2004

The Night of the Bat

While living in Ansbach we occupied the 4th floor of a leased housing apartment complex.  The apartment was very spacious and I loved it except for the fact that there were no window screens or security bars on the windows.  In the hot summer, without airconditioning, we were forced to open the windows, leaving our apartment open to anything that flew.  Never having lived in anything higher than a 2 story house, I quickly learned that mosquitoes can either fly as high as a 4 story window, or know how to use the elevator.  Either way they made me into an All-U-Can-Eat buffet all summer.  And there was something about the mosquitoes there that left festering welts bigger than my boobs!

My second summer there found me very pregnant.  I was seeing a German doctor, a wonderful gentleman who wasn't one bit concerned that I had gained 35 pounds by my 8th month.  He gave me a due date of August 19.

August 19, 1989  4:30 am.  I wake suddenly.  Before I know whats happening Steve swears, sits up and tosses something across the room.  I hear the cat yeow just before a crash against the wall.  I just know Steve has killed the cat, but why?  Something swoops by my face.  Steve hollers and jumps up.  The cat has recovered from the loss of one of his lives and is back on the bed, hissing and howling, claws raking me through the sheet.  Is it a moth?  I ask.  That ain't no moth!  Steve says.  BAT!

So Steve gets this great idea.... use the bats sonar to guide it to the window!  The bat has the advantage in the dark so
Steve turns on the light, then stands on the bed, holding up the sheet to create a barrier for the bats sonar to bounce off of.  When I finally get over the shock I just took in the scene and laughed!  There was Steve, naked as the day he was born, holding up the sheet and running around the room after the tiny flying creature while Pondo the inbred farm cat was jumping off of all of the furniture like a rabid animal, and all infront of the wide open window, lights blaring, for the whole neighborhood to see!
Between Steve and Pondo, the bat was eventually pursuaded to vacate the premises... either that or it didn't like the scenery!  Either way, it left.  Steve and Pondo collapsed on thebed like conquering heros.  I just sat there laughing so hard I put myself into labor.  Arthur Lyle was born later that day.  Now, when ever I see a bat I am reminded of that night, and it always brings a smile to my face.  I secretly believe Steve is really creeped out by bats, but how can I be afraid of something that brings back such halarious memories?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Pondo the inbred farm cat?"  I can't stop guffawing!

Anonymous said...

haha..that was a good one

Anonymous said...

haha..that was a good one..that woulda been funnier for cops to hear if someone saw and heard all that madness..just imagine the call to them..hahah