Friday, January 14, 2005

MOUSE BALLS

Do you know what this is a picture of?  Its mouse turds!  Not Mickey Mouse turds, but computer mouse turds.  I clean my mouse out every couple of months or so... I open the bottom, pull out the ball (my mouse only has one ball, poor little thing, no wonder he always pulls to the left).  And I have to scrape off those little roller thingies that help the ball go 'round, and this is what I pull out, every time!  I don't get it... its not like I have crud all over my mouse pad or anything.  So where does this junk come from?  I'm afraid if I look hard enough I might see it move!  It can't be healthy!  Anyhow... if you don't clean your mouse's ball, do it.  Be careful, you don't want to damage anything, just flip your mouse upsidedown, unscrew the ball-holder and the ball should just drop out.  Gently clean the rollers with a cotton swab moistened with... alcohol?  Actually I drink the alcohol and scrape the rollers with my fingernail to remove the crusty scuzz... but thats just me.  Its not unusual for your computer screen to react irradically at this point, after all, the mouse's ball is a very sensitive area.  Just keep a firm grip on the mouse and work carefully.  Return the ball to its little hole, replace the cover and secure, and you're back in business!  What ever you do... under no circumstances should you give in to the temptation to sniff the scuzz-particles... unless you don't mind having a nose full of mouse turds of unknown biological origins!  (Did you ever read Stephen King's Dream Catcher?)  Anyhow, thats how to keep your mouse's ball clean and your computer happy!

19 comments:

g1itterkat said...

girl u crack me up, u really do!!!! you have cheered me up no end lmao xx poor mouse, anything you can do for his lack of ball situation??

Jay xx
http://journals.aol.co.uk/g1itterkat/OurBrood/

geminiwilder said...

huh, you're funny!  we have one of those laser mouse thingies, so i do believe it is ball-less!!  poor thing!   ack!  hehe.  

purplectigger said...

You are a hoot. I should have a good day, now that I've had a good laugh. Thanks. I have an optical mouse, no ball. Sammie told me the optical were much better. She's right. Have a great day.
R.C.

csandhollow said...

I had my mouse neutered, no ball. O yea no tail either!

articwulf58368 said...

This is now one of my favorite journals! You crack me up! http://journals.aol.com/articwulf58368/StressofaWoman/

mumma4evr said...

I do believe you are a woman after my own heart,.,,one sick woman that is!!
Becky

greyhoundloner03 said...

Honey, you shoulda seen the crap that came out of the back of my CPU when I dragged it out from under my desk.  Ewwww

stephweiss said...

Xpln clnng th kybrd nxt, pls. Mstl, I nd to knw hw t rmv chckn sp fm vwls....

amy122389 said...

I skip the alcohol and use my fingernail, too.....LOL
~Amy

lacaza3 said...

I have a laptop it is female it has no balls Ha!! Only has a pad to tap
donna In TEXAS

astaryth said...

Ewwwwwww...... Can we say Optical Mouse??? Not only do you not have to clean out the ball, but it works on almost any surface (for when I misplace the mousepad <g>... And, when all else fails, this is a laptop, and I can resort to the built in pad <LOL>
http://journals.aol.com/astaryth/AdventuresofanEclecticMind

mykesmom75 said...

Your descriptions are sooo funny thanks for the laugh and info....

bosoxblue6993w said...

Alas!  MY mouse has BLUE BALLS.!  I think I need to use it more.

chattiekimmie said...

My poor mouse' ball is black.  Think I had too many headaches and didn't pay it enough attention because it's beyond blue and has died!  :)  

sdoscher458 said...

Dorn LMAO....how often do you clean a mouse's ball? When it stops rolling? I just turned mine over and it has this twist thing, the ball popped out....but no dirt...I was figuring there would be some....oh, well, dust bunnies are afraid of my desk! Sandi....

swmpgrly said...

Lmao love your journal

cneinhorn said...

mouse turds! LOL....

~JerseyGirl

glopsblink said...

You make it sound so pornographic Dorn! I'm lucky, my mouse is a girl, as it doesn't have a ball but a laser (optical mouse). That stuff is probably just the dust that falls on your mouse pad, then gets rolled up into the mouse as you use it.

Oh well, I am laughing too hard to say anymore on this. Blessings. :)

http://journals.aol.com/glopsblink/ATreasureTroveofGoodies

mzgoochi said...

LMAO!! Only you Dorn, only you!!

big hug!