Tuesday, September 20, 2005

READY OR NOT, THERE HE GOES...

No, I'm not ready.  But it doesn't matter.  In a few hours my son will be flying into war.  I'm sitting here, hoping the phone will ring so I can hear his voice once more before he leaves, and yet hoping that it doesn't because I wouldn't be able to bear having to eventually hang up and let him go. 

He called from a bar last night.  He was having his last beer for a year.  And he sang AC/DC's Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap to me when it blasted over the speakers.  He has no idea what he is getting in to.  None of them do.  They just have stories of glory and heroism that the older soldiers shared over beer and pizza after work.  They watch too much TV, too many movies.  Even the most graphic movies can never depict the horrors of a real war.  I don't even know myself what it is like, but I know its potential and no song played on a jukebox can ever really gear anyone up for the reality of it.

I'm babbling, I'm sorry.  I'm trying not to think, which only leads to worrying.  I've got to stop that.  Gabe says he's ready.  He says he'll be fine, that he is with a great unit.  I have to keep my faith in them, and in him.  In the mean time I will sit here and pray that all of this craziness ends soon.

And Gabe, son of mine, DON'T FORGET TO WEAR YOUR FIRE PROOF MAN-PANTIES! 

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

I was sitting here thinking the same thing when I got your journal post. I know that no matter what we as mothers say to our boys they are going to be "the tough guy". Does it scare me? You bet! I sit here praying that God will send his angels to go before our boys ( Gabe & Jared) and to protect them and keep them safe. Jared will be gone for 18 months. That is a long time. God speed them home.

Anonymous said...

god bless, I can not imagine your pain and suffering.
he will be ok. out it in the lords hands that is all we can do.

Anonymous said...

Dorn.....Gabe is a spiritual (Hopi) young man, he will need to rely on many of the things that has been taught and passed down to him. I think these are the things that will protect him and keep him from harm and having a tight unit will help them all  becareful......you are sending away a boy, but a man will be the one returning to you......I have faith in that eagle feather!

Anonymous said...

((((Dorn))))?  You're his mom, remember?  So he'll be just fine.  Listen to the demandinlittlething justbelow me here. ;)  C.  http://journals.aol.com/gdireneoe/thedailies

Anonymous said...

(((Dorn))) I hope the year goes so fast, that he is home before you know it safe and sound. I wish they would all come home....Sandi

Anonymous said...

Dorn, I can feel your concern and I can only imagine what it must feel like...I don't know what else to say other than I will keep you all in my prayers that he stays safe and that you can find comfort until he comes back home again....

Anonymous said...

Dorn,

Know that we are here with you, as much as we can be via the internet, and holding your hand as you go through this.  You are right, they don't know what they are really facing, but they have been trained by the best and they are the best.  I am praying for you and yours and Gabe...that he comes home safe, and you all cope while he is gone.  I am praying for all our soldiers there.

Oh and if you really think that is his last beer for a year...lol

Be well,
Dawn
http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/
Poetry:

Anonymous said...

hope those panties are comfortable...lol

Anonymous said...

((((((Dorn)))))))  I am so proud to *know your son, and I thank him every day for going to protect my freedom.  You're an amazing mother.
Hugs,
xoxo
heather

Anonymous said...

I'm hear for you any time if you need to talk. You and yours are in my prayers everyday. I pray for Gabe's safety. Hopefully the year will go fast for you.
Hugs, R.C.

Anonymous said...

Dorn....I am so proud to know you!!!!!  You are holding up better than I would!!!
Becky

Anonymous said...

I just hope that Gabe is able to stay connected via the internet to his loving family and friends. It will help so much on both sides. I received a very troubling email a few days ago that said they are not allowing soldiers in Iraq Internet access. I truly hope it's wrong, and I really think it must be.
When I asked the person for the source he couldn't tell me, so again I'm hoping it's just a bad rumor.
Please let us know the moment that Gabe contacts you...
Hugs,
Maryanne

Anonymous said...

My heart goes out to you!  This entry brought tears to my eyes.  My own son is 25 so I understand SOME of the emotions you are feeling.  But, true to form, you still added some humor for us at the end.  God bless you.
Donna

Anonymous said...

Jody, I think you are the only one who can make me cry and laugh in the same entry.  My eyes were tearing up for you, for Gabe, and then I got to that last line and found myself laughing so hard it made my belly shake about the fireproof man-panties.  Somehow, I always pictured our military as strong, but it is hard to picture them as strong wearing man-panties, lol.

On a more serious note, my heart goes out to you.  Being a mother, I don't know how I would deal with it.  Just know you have my love, support, and prayers.

Blessings!
Susan
http://journals.aol.com/rjet33/CountryLivingSouthernStyle

Anonymous said...

Hugs for you Gabe Stay Safe

Deb

Anonymous said...

Oh, Dorn, I do not know what to say. I am crying for you.  I have sent you my phone number if you ever need to talk since we never go to sleep before three or four am.

love, Kas

Anonymous said...

Gabe is your Son... And you raised him to be strong and independent... As hard as it is, you know he will do well... He remains in my thoughts, as do you. {{Hugs}} for both of you... And, Gabe.. Wear Those Man-Panties!!!
http://journals.aol.com/astaryth/AdventuresofanEclecticMind

Anonymous said...

I can't even imagine the worry and suffering you are going through Dorn. I can make you a promise though. Gabe will be in my prayers until he returns safely home to his Mama.

Love, Lahoma