Monday, September 27, 2004

POLYESTER PANTS

I'm wearing polyester pants today.  For those of you who are too young to know the meaning of polyester.... think 'polyesterday pants', think nylon disco bell-bottoms.  Think 'melt to your skin if someone drops a cigarette on you' pants. 

Polyester was the thing when I was in high school.  Boys had Angel's Flights... those skin tight slacks with the seams up the front like John Travolta and the off-sided package... hmmm, leftie or rightie?  Guys couldn't wear boxers with those pants, it was either briefs or nothing!

Girls had their own version of Angels Flights, but we were built differently so tight was definitely a no-no!  Wear your slacks too tight and you'd have 'camel toe' in the front, and 'hungry butt' in the back.  (thats a self-imposed wedgie).  And for the ample-thighed there was the risk of friction burn where the material rubbed together.

Sooooo, here I am, 25 years later, wearing a pair of polyester slacks that I would have been proud to wear in high school.  It has perpetual front creases... it never needs to be ironed (don't iron it... it will melt to your iron!), and the neat thing is... these slacks are actually 2 sizes smaller than what I wore in high school!  Now excuse me while I go try to do something about that granny-pantie line... I may have to do the faux-thong quick-fix.... thats when you yank your pantie into your crack to hide the pantie line.  It works great, but it feels like you've got a Pamper up your butt... not recommended for activities that last longer than a couple of hours.  This should get me through lunch... when I can buy a real thong (butt floss... it takes some getting used to but they're really quite comfortable).

 

8 comments:

maxina3777 said...

Well I can certainly relate. I had spent the nite at my moms house for the weekend. I had went out Friday nite (okay I left earlier that day on a mission to look into a job, but then decided to go to my cousins house afterwards) when I finaly* got to her house to pick up my son I decided it was too late and I'd haveher take me home the next day, the only thing was I had on a dress..... so i barrowed a cute alphet of hers, then my son got ick, so I eneded up changing a few times... my Mom and i did a lot of laundry that day, but still by the time Sunday came around, all I could fit into was these Polyester pants, that are made to look like codoroys*. I don't mind the material, but the shape of the pants, I like wearing long pants (I have long legs) and I like my pants slim at the waist and boot legged. Not to mention i was wearing a long turtle neck LMAO oversized clothing (just because the way that they were made-wink- my Mom is actualy almost real slender, she has a cute figure). I looked like a clown. I when it came time to go home, I rushed myself into the car so that I wouldn't haveto be seen by any of the neighbors LOL.

beckieramos said...

Hi! Praying for your son's success and safety in the service. God bless, Beckie

sprite1229 said...

::Sings:: thong thong thong thong thong..

mzgoochi said...

LMAO! Do what I do, yank the undies off!
LMAO about the camel toe, never heard it called that. I've always heard it called deer hoof.

st0rmwhispers said...

I love thongs........I I am one of the ample-thighed....ROFLMAO...Thank God I don't have to deal with elastic-leg-rash anymore!

wumzels2 said...

omg dorn, i am about 5-6 years older than you, and i had a whole wardrobe of those pants......even a couple of those dresses made from the polyester that was bonded to some sort of foam with netting bonded to the back of that........have no clue what people were thinking of back then.  and as for being flammable, i am surprised the world didn't stop smoking and toking back then.  you could go up in smoke in seconds.  there was this girl in my high school that had this great figure, and she would wear the top to a pantsuit, without the bottom.  and being polyester, it would not flow, but just be very stiff and straight.  so all the boys would follow her to the water fountain to see her bend to drink......there was always a bet on whether or not she was wearing............undies that is.  as for thongs..........no way jose........argh................thanks for the memories dorn.
blessings, regina
http://journals.aol.com/wumzels2/SEDUCTIONOFLIFE

hestiahomeschool said...

whenever I am feeling down I can count on you for a laugh.

scooterbanjo said...

I'll be they look better on you than you think, especially if they're black or some other dark color.  In addition, polyester doesn't get all those wrinkles and creases in the crotch when you sit for a long time like cotton slacks do.  And the stitched creases are a nice touch.